The other day, I attended a case consultation webinar with Psychotherapy.net’s founder, Victor Yalom, who demonstrated, and then discussed, supervision with a beginning therapist. As he was addressing the importance of creating a therapeutic atmosphere in which both client and clinician are fully engaged, he described the intricacies of learning table tennis. Almost as an aside, he suggested that, like his time on the table tennis mat with his instructor, therapy — good therapy — is a “full-body contact body sport.” Currently trying to learn the torturous game of golf with the assistance of my own instructor, I fully resonated with his aside.
You probably knew where this essay was going. To therapy, of course! And first to Carl Rogers, who understood that effective therapy was built on a relationship between client and clinician in which congruence, or full presence, was a prerequisite. The person-centered clinician asks the client to be open to — and willing to share — their most intimate thoughts and feelings in search of unity between their “real” and “ideal” self. Similarly, the clinician, to provide a space in which the client is willing to take this step, must be congruent — fully present, self-aware, and open to the client’s experience. Fully-embodied contact!
Existential psychotherapist Irvin Yalom teaches us that for a client to venture into the realm of challenges and concerns that define their humanity and allow them to relate healthily to others, the clinician must help them focus on the here-and-now. This notion, while simply said, is not always easy to achieve with a client who comes to therapy in distress, deeply conflicted, and struggling to meaningfully connect with others. The clinician encourages the client to take the risk to be fully present — body and mind — in the therapeutic relationship while also making the same demand of themselves. The in-the-moment therapeutic relationship becomes the table tennis mat, or golf course, on which clinician and client move together towards healing and growth. Full contact!
Few have illustrated this notion of full body contact better than Peter Levine, developer of Somatic Experiencing. For Levine, who is doubly credentialled in psychology and biophysics, clients who have been traumatized benefit from learning how to control the flow of energy through their body. The goal of effective intervention with them — and with others struggling to self-regulate — is to learn how to stay centered, calm, and present within themselves. To help their client to achieve these goals, the therapist must travel down a similar path, listening to cues within their own bodies that resonate with, or are triggered by, those of the client. Full body to full body contact. Co-regulation if you will!
Isn’t this co-regulation, full-body contact, embodied connection, or whatever you choose to call it, also part and parcel of effective countertransference management — a state of delicate full-bodied self-awareness in response to that of another. A moment of reciprocal “I-Thou-ness."
So, perhaps the next time you sit with a client, or trainee, or supervisee, and wonder if you have made a deep and meaningful connection in the service of healing and/or learning, do a full-bodied self-check-in as you encourage your client to do the same. And as in any “sport,” whether it be golf, table tennis, or some other, give yourself permission to evolve as you practice, and the consolation that in this sport of psychotherapy, practice will never make perfect. But you’ll get better at it.
Questions for Thought and Discussion
What does the notion of therapy as a full body contact sport mean to you?
With which kind of clients do you find it easier to work in this full-body contact way? Which are more difficult for you?
What techniques do you use in and out of therapy to be in full-body contact with yourself? With others?
File under: The Art of Psychotherapy, Musings and Reflections, Therapy Training
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Body and Mind
Whether on the table tennis mat or golf course, the student must not only integrate their own mind and body, but must also be fully open to the instructor, who is doing the same within their own skin — as they mold, model, and instruct their student. So, a good “lesson” involves a balanced and delicate dance between student and teacher, where both simultaneously merge self-awareness with an awareness of the other. Full-body contact sport!You probably knew where this essay was going. To therapy, of course! And first to Carl Rogers, who understood that effective therapy was built on a relationship between client and clinician in which congruence, or full presence, was a prerequisite. The person-centered clinician asks the client to be open to — and willing to share — their most intimate thoughts and feelings in search of unity between their “real” and “ideal” self. Similarly, the clinician, to provide a space in which the client is willing to take this step, must be congruent — fully present, self-aware, and open to the client’s experience. Fully-embodied contact!
Existential psychotherapist Irvin Yalom teaches us that for a client to venture into the realm of challenges and concerns that define their humanity and allow them to relate healthily to others, the clinician must help them focus on the here-and-now. This notion, while simply said, is not always easy to achieve with a client who comes to therapy in distress, deeply conflicted, and struggling to meaningfully connect with others. The clinician encourages the client to take the risk to be fully present — body and mind — in the therapeutic relationship while also making the same demand of themselves. The in-the-moment therapeutic relationship becomes the table tennis mat, or golf course, on which clinician and client move together towards healing and growth. Full contact!
Few have illustrated this notion of full body contact better than Peter Levine, developer of Somatic Experiencing. For Levine, who is doubly credentialled in psychology and biophysics, clients who have been traumatized benefit from learning how to control the flow of energy through their body. The goal of effective intervention with them — and with others struggling to self-regulate — is to learn how to stay centered, calm, and present within themselves. To help their client to achieve these goals, the therapist must travel down a similar path, listening to cues within their own bodies that resonate with, or are triggered by, those of the client. Full body to full body contact. Co-regulation if you will!
Isn’t this co-regulation, full-body contact, embodied connection, or whatever you choose to call it, also part and parcel of effective countertransference management — a state of delicate full-bodied self-awareness in response to that of another. A moment of reciprocal “I-Thou-ness."
So, perhaps the next time you sit with a client, or trainee, or supervisee, and wonder if you have made a deep and meaningful connection in the service of healing and/or learning, do a full-bodied self-check-in as you encourage your client to do the same. And as in any “sport,” whether it be golf, table tennis, or some other, give yourself permission to evolve as you practice, and the consolation that in this sport of psychotherapy, practice will never make perfect. But you’ll get better at it.
Questions for Thought and Discussion
What does the notion of therapy as a full body contact sport mean to you?
With which kind of clients do you find it easier to work in this full-body contact way? Which are more difficult for you?
What techniques do you use in and out of therapy to be in full-body contact with yourself? With others?
File under: The Art of Psychotherapy, Musings and Reflections, Therapy Training