Dan Wile, PhD

Dan Wile, PhD Dan Wile, PhD is the developer of Collaborative Couples Therapy, and the author of Couples Therapy: a Nontraditional Approach, After the Honeymoon: How Conflict Can Improve Your Relationship, and After the Fight: Using Your Disagreements to Build a Stronger Relationship, as well as over 20 articles and chapters. John Gottman, the preeminent researcher on couples therapy has described Dr. Wile as "a genius and the greatest living couples therapist." His website is www.danwile.com.

Turning Blaming into Confiding in Couples Therapy

By Dan Wile, PhD on 6/23/11 - 9:06 AM

The defining task in a Collaborative Couple Therapy session is to create an intimate conversation out of whatever is happening—frequently a fight. Sometimes that means helping the partner who has just been accused deal with the accusation. Sometimes, and this is my focus in this write-up, that means reshaping the accusing partner’s angry statement. I speak as if I were that partner, translating his/her blaming statement into a confiding one, in a method similar to doubling in psychodrama. I show...

Collaborative Couple Therapy With Hig...

By Dan Wile, PhD

Interacting Sensitivities in Couples ...

By Dan Wile, PhD

Rules for a Good Relationship

By Dan Wile, PhD

Bids for Emotional Connection in Couples Therapy

By Dan Wile, PhD on 11/15/10 - 12:03 PM

John Gottman’s concept, “bids for emotional connection,” is practically a complete theory of relationships in itself. Hearing the word “bids,” we picture partners reaching out to each other in a variety of ways. Gary Chapman, in his book, <em>The Five Love Languages</em>, lists five such ways: words of affirmation (“That situation was delicate and you really handled it beautifully”), touch (“How about a hug?”), quality time (“Let’s get a babysitter and make a reservation at Chez Alouette”), gifts (“This scarf...

Empowering Clients in Couples Therapy

By Dan Wile, PhD